This is so fucked up :[

Stepford daughter.

Eight seconds in, does the four year old say, "Awww, shit!"?

Paula Abdul got an early start on her career.

What the fuck is that abomination

You want to be thin or you want to be conscious? You can't be both sweetheart.

I can't see how child beauty pageants aren't counted as child abuse.

Needs an "uncanny valley" tag.

The Tammy Fay muppet has collapsed.

Her tan isn't dark enough. MAKE IT DARKER.

"I am the Lizard King! Aw, shit, I fell in the sizzling-hot footlights again."

If Jack Black and Patton Oswalt had a baby

an FAS baby

Also, voting for "sugar laden mutation" as a tag.

I just had a flashback to Madeline Kahn's number in Blazing Saddles.

Portal of this

Quick! Someone get her more pixie stix and coke stat!

Every nightmare has spilled over into reality.

From Youtube:

"Aw bless! She isn't creepy! She's really cute and likes to do pageants. Why are you saying she's creepy when all she does is fall off her chair, which we have all done before, in an episode or whatever of T&T?
TheChipettes10 2 months ago"

Appropriate user name.

Just get out the spritzer and squirt her a few times, she'll be okay!