More proof that a parachute is not as safe as staying groundborne.

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Comment count is 33

fermun

- 2008-06-19

Hey, it's also perfectly safe to stay airborne. It is only in that transition between the two that trouble arises.

freedoom

- 2008-06-19

No, its the sudden stop at the end of the transition.

FABIO2 - 2008-06-19

The old Airforce saying: "Never jump out of a perfectly good plane."

RockBolt

- 2008-06-19

There's no such thing as a perfectly good pilot

freedoom - 2008-06-19

The only thing that can be worse is if he skydived into a helicopter in flight which then crashed into an orphanage. the one surviving orphan gaining super powers and then attempting to take over the world.

zatojones

- 2008-06-19

The observers walk away in shock but the one little boy present runs towards the dead guy

Caminante Nocturno

- 2008-06-19

Even though the other witnesses slink away in fear and horror, Ness bravely runs to the scene. He's seen worse.

Far, far worse.

chumbucket

- 2008-06-19

...and sees something he'll never ever forget

BiggerJ

- 2008-12-29

The boy defeated an evil entity by (according to popular opinion) traveling back in time and aborting its fetal form while inhabiting a robot body and thinking that he'd never return to his own. This is small potatoes.

Aelric

- 2008-06-19

so wait, if he didn't open his reserve, that means he had probable passed out during the drop. thing is, i thought it was an international standard to have a third, smaller emergency chute connected to an altimeter that deploys at a safe(r) level. perhaps not in columbia.

sure, there is no totally safe drop, but it's pretty close. and that margin of error is why we do it.

mouser - 2008-06-19

Dont reserves have an altimeter to them to cause them to automatically open should the main chute fail and you're unconscious?

Rafiki

- 2008-06-19

Isn't there supposed to be a 4th chute that isn't actually a parachute, it just sprays confetti into the air if you hit the ground?

Aelric - 2008-06-20

rafiki is obviously in the industry.

mouser: i didn't say it right before but yes and no. some packs just have two, in which case the "reserve" is the emergency and is hooked to the dead man altimeter switch. the times i've jumped, which is admittedly few (6), the emergency was a third shoot.

Big Beef Burritos Supreme - 2008-10-15

Candy, actually. The boy walking towards the body knows that.

Repomancer - 2009-08-15

You are required to fill your pockets with quarters and candybars before jumping.

Big Beef Burritos Supreme

- 2008-06-19

Click click click click. This lighter is so not wind proof.

boner - 2008-06-19

Someone has to die once in a while, to keep the sport exciting.

Repomancer

- 2008-06-19

HE WENT SPLAT! ALL OVER

-1 for the supremely annoying narrator.

Desidiosus

- 2008-06-19

-1 for no explosion of blood and guts over the treeline.

j lzrd / swift idiot

- 2008-07-11

I hear skydivers basically bounce once when their chute fails, on impact, and stay intact; it's a different story if they're falling at an angle.

StanleyPain

- 2008-06-19

If only Coleman Francis had been there to help.

Green

- 2008-07-20

Coffee is a major plot point!

Monchiles Monchiles

- 2008-06-19

Too far away from point of impact. No blood and guts. Still, a fairly entertaining minute.

Camonk

- 2008-06-19

He's hurt! Hurt bad! What do we do? Run!

Keefu

- 2008-06-19

The old Looney Tunes "no parachute" gag isn't so funny in real life, I guess.

At least, it didn't turn out to be an anvil though.

kiint

- 2008-06-19

shnuff

TinManic

- 2008-06-20

(to the chorus of Battle Hymn of the Republic):

Glory, glory,
What a hell of a way to die
With a rifle up your ass
And a bullet in the eye
Glory, glory,
What a hell of a way to die
When your ball hang lower
Than your paratrooper boots.

Repomancer - 2009-02-13

That doesn't even vaguely think about beginning to approximate a bad dream of the chorus of the Battle Hymn of the Republic's meter even if you ran it through Babelfish ten times while drunk. Are you sure you weren't thinking of "Freebird?"

athodyd

- 2008-06-20

i love you cheetos

SpookyElectric

- 2008-06-21

Columbia? COL.U.MBIA?!

:(

GusPlease

- 2008-07-18

OH MY GOD WAS HE OKAY???

Cleaner82

- 2008-08-13

"Oh my god I think he's dead..."

"... I could use a smoke, you coming?"

"Fuck yes."

Meerkat

- 2009-02-07

And Kenny runs.

"Don't go Kenny, it will be horrible!"

"I don't care!"

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