After you die, they throw you a big party in heaven, and you, God and all His Angles watch old home movies of you masturbating for seventy years. Forty years in, you'll want to tell God that you're tired from the long trip, and is it okay if if I just go ahead to the lake of fire now?

He *isn't* gone, though, no more than Mozart, or Picasso, or Aristotle are gone. His art lives on. His ideas lives on. The flesh may be cold, but the Word, transcendent.

I keep seeing a lot of people doubt that he's actually dead, which is weird given that he was 92 freaking years old.

For a while there, I thought Chick might actually be God himself, given what a hateful bastard he was and how long he'd been at this.

Here here, the internet treats him like a mere joke, but there was a time when his comics and the preacher who passed them out really fucked with my mind. I was young, trusted religious figures, and my dad had recently died. I was raised in a mainly Catholic with a little Protestantism mixed in, but I was unaware of Jack Chick's anti-Catholic hate and conspiracies. So here comes this dude who seems very confident with his faith, can rattle off Bible verses to back his shit without a sweat, and saying Catholics go to Hell. It boggles my mind to think that I at one point was on the path to becoming a fundie.

Sorry, Cena, while I respect your right to be bitter and hateful, I'm going to have to stop you there.

When *I* was a kid, my best friend's neighbour was a fundie who used to leave new Chick tracts for him every few days. My friend amassed quite a collection of Chick tracts (dozens of issues) and they started scaring him. At the time, we were listening to whatever Beavis & Butthead liked - mainly Metallica and White Zombie - but that was a problem, because according to Jack Chick, heavy metal was evil and incredibly dangerous. So my buddy called me up one night and said that he wasn't sure he could listen to "La Sexorcisto: Devil Music Vol 1" anymore, and after thinking it over, I told him "yeah, yeah, it probably IS dangerous listening to all this music, your family being Christians and all. But my family's not Christian, so if you'd like, I could take the albums off your hands for you."

And that is how I acquired my collection of White Zombie albums. So... fuck yeah, Jack Chick! Dude's a-OK in my books!

But maybe your friend should be mad at Jack for causing him to part with his secular music.

He's got plenty of secular music NOW, though. His faith in secular music is all the stronger today, as it was forged in the fires of fundie tracts.

Why should he be mad at Mr Chick, for giving him that chance to grow?

Yes, there was a tract directed at this very issue. As so.

https://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0034/0034_01.asp

I amassed quite a collection of these tracts over the years, they were a source of amusement to all of my friends. The speaker demons as shown here

http://media.chick.com/tractimages67491/0034/0034_16.gif

were of particular interest. How could we coax those little guys out of our amplifiers? Jack could have elaborated on that point more, you know? Perhaps now with some direct experience he'd be more savvy.

I still remember the amazing lyrics to the song they were singing.

In fairness, early White Zombie REALLY played up the Satanic Panic angle. It was part of their charm.

And Jack wasn't necessarily wrong! Entertainment executives ARE pretty evil, while blasphemy, demon worship, and soul-selling are common motifs across American popular music. It started with Robert Johnson at the crossroads, and now we're at the point where David Bowie's final single was an admitted Theosophist blood-ritual, and normies don't even bat an eye.

Hell, it was only a couple years after the Tract incident that me and my friends were rocking out to stuff like Burzum and Dissection. One of Mr Dissection's friends ate a dude. That's pretty messed up. Rock and roll is clearly a gateway to that!

Theosophist ...blood ritual?!?! Come on EH, what's next, the Elk's Club Moon Child?

No! I swear it on Odin's eye! Have you ever seen "Blackstar"?

Go watch that video. First thing I thought was, wow, this is some hardcore Theosophic shit right here. Then I started to notice the YT Truther networks picking up on it, and I figure'd I'd do some research. Eventually found an article, this pretentious art-blog interview with the guy who did Bowie's art direction. Dude was straight up like "Yeah, I really like Blavatsky and Crowley; me and David wanted to put a load of theosophic themes in the Blackstar video etc etc" I mean, there's no flipping way you can miss it, but the director is pretty open about it too, so...

Aqua does that shit, too.

Can't find the other one, but here's a Vice interview that covers much the same territory:

https://noisey.vice.com/en_us/article/david-bowie-blackstar-vi deo-johan-renck-director-interview

And for the sake of illustration, here's the Blackstar video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kszLwBaC4Sw

Can you picture normie audiences in 1952 watching something like that? I sure can't! Rock's DEFINITELY been breaking down mainstream society's love of Christianity and hostility towards occultism; the only question is whether you think this is a good thing, a bad thing, or just the same old bollocks in a different crisps packet.

That baby at 3:10,. already corrupted by original sin. Drawing a mean-looking baby must take some kind of skill.

IThis is the classic Chick tract, of course, the one you see everywhere, and I have to admit, it's stuck with me.

I say I'm an agnostic. It migiht be more accurate to say that I'm an atheist and a Christian sharing one brain. I have only recently realized how much of my idea of an afterlife comes from this very same publication. It's the genius of the thiing. It's simple and logical, yet it captures the imagination. It sticks with you, These publications must have been a huge influence on people's lives.

That baby has the head of Ian Curtis

Just try and name a better porn storyline.

You're dead Jack, you don't EXIST anymore.