"If you have sex outside of marriage, YOU WILL PAY!"

Well no one's paying you, that's for fucking sure.

Fortunately these people have lost the debate.
It's really hard to keep kids from learning about sex unless you homeschool them.

In my opinion, kids in high school shouldn't be having sex. Maybe they're ready, maybe they aren't, but they probably aren't, and the consequences for getting it wrong could be serious, are likely to be messy and painful, and are almost certainly going to involve a lot of horrible teenage bullshit, that you're liable to look back on with profound embarrassment. Having sex won't make you a bad person, or a dirty shoe, or a chewed up piece of gum, but if you pass up sex until you're eighteen, you're probably passing up an unpleasant experience.

I wish somebody somewhere would say that to kids, because that seems sensible to me. I'm just as troubled by this "some of you will want to have sex, and that's okay" business. If you're fifteen, you should cool your jets. I don't have a problem with kids getting that message. Nobody ever tells kids to wait... not for marriage, but for when you're sort of a grown up, with a sort of a grown up partner. Sure, kids don't always respond well to being told they're not ready, but they don't respond well to being lied to, either.

If you're not old enough to decide to have sex, you're not old enough to decide that you shouldn't have sex until marriage. When you're an adult, you get to decide, and you should be prepared for that. That's the only real truth, everything else is a lie.

"In my opinion, kids in high school shouldn't be having sex."

Maybe not, but good luck enforcing it.

That said, there is a world of complexities that opens up when sex enters the picture, and I definitely agree that teenagers need a version of The Talk that tries to cover that. Mother Nature has a nasty sense of humor, she'll make you think you're in love with someone so that you'll fuck enough to ensure pregnancy, and our smartypants ape-brains are largely hostages to the process ... teenagers would do well to get a little forewarning, for all the good it will do them.

Kids in high school should and will be having sex (with each other).
They should learn how to be adults and they should be treated like adults. Physically, they are adults.

>>Kids in high school should and will be having sex (with each other).
They should learn how to be adults and they should be treated like adults. Physically, they are adults.

That approach has a lot in common with abstinence-only, in that, as Al Franken, used to say, it works great, until it doesn't. Letting kids go to it because they can will result in some disasters. A girl who used to live real close to where I am now got pregnant at 15, and when she was sixteen, her seventeen year old boyfriend strangled her to death.

Of course, they're adults PHYSICALLY, but psychologically they're usually idiots. I'm pretty sure that developmental psychological will back me up on this, The brain is still forming, and so is the personality. When humans only lived to be 35 or so, having a full sex life, including children, at 15 was a good idea. We may be predisposed by evolution to get knocked up as soon as possible. Being too dumb to grasp the consequences may have been a good thing for the survival of the species, but the species is doing fine now We live a lot longer, our lives are way more complex, and it's become traditional to give children about 20 years for maturation and education.

Taking the necessary time to mature is one of the great gifts of civilization. We can afford to wait until we have a fully developed sense of self before we engage in intimate relationships. Not every kid is going to wait until they're eighteen, and eighteen is an arbitrary age to decide that kids are old enough, but I think it's a reasonable thing to aim for, I'm not a parent, so it doesn't matter what I think, and even if I was a parent, like Bort said, Good luck enforcing it. But it's a more reasonable thing to tell kids other than never outside of marriage.

Kids are going to do what they're going to do, but if you don't tell them what you expect of them, or if you don't expect anything of them, you're letting them down, and when they get in trouble, it's your fault.

Sex changes everything and can invite complications into anyone's lives or relationships, regardless of age. Outside erotica it's a significant game changer.

But this lady doesn't have teenagers figured out if she thinks screaming at them will convince them not to fuck. They will believe nothing else they're told about sex once they learn they've been lied to. Fighting for independence, distrust of adults - was Pam Stenzel ever fifteen?

I agree that most teenagers really aren't ready for sex and its possible consequences. The human brain isn't really done developing until you're about 25, and the last part to finish is where we predict the long-term consequences of our actions. Obviously most people aren't going to wait that long, but the new and fashionable "sex is totally A-OK" attitude that some people have with teens is not very responsible. I think teens need to be given the right tools to make good decisions, and a little bit of fear of what might happen is not necessarily a bad thing. The problem is when people distort the truth or outright lie to teens just to try to make them scared of sex. That doesn't work either.

I lost mine when I was 15 and honestly don't see much of a change in my sexual behavior at 33. I mentioned in a different video that we got sex ed at far too young an age (starting in 4th grade) and we'd mostly just giggle at "penis" and such, ask the teacher stupid questions about drinking Mountain Dew and having sex, and the rest of what I didn't learn in class was my fault for not really paying much attention.

But you sort of vicariously learn these things with or without sex ed, even if others make the mistakes you learn from: there was a girl at my school who got pregnant at age 13 by a 14 year old and had the baby. Luckily she had a great support system and as far as I know they're both doing fine but by the time I was 15 I pretty much knew what to do and what not to do without somebody telling me how to and how not to do it, and how to handle it if something did happen.

And while that's a horrible story, JHM, that could happen at any age, and often does.

For posterity:
http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=147224

> Ugh, you don't need to yell if you have a microphone, Lady.

And this is her job. She does public speaking for a living.

So, a diaphragm, then.