Lizard neck.

Bespectacled child calling out to Allah.

I would gladly pass cash American dollars to see this.

I don't think anyone would want it after that.

Well, maybe crackheads.

He's a mormon .NET programmer. That seems about right.

I wonder if she's happy with the choices she's made.

According to the site, they got engaged eleven days after they met, which was the first day back in school after his mission.

BYU: Ring Before Spring or Your Money Back!

"A torrent of watery darts hit the windshield as the ambulance squealed around another corner. The hospital was not much farther. A spark of lightning erupted in the night sky, as if to point the way the ambulance should go. Rumbling sounds resonated from the darkness above, accompanied by a faint groan of atmospheric indigestion echoing in the distance. The storm, like the mighty hand of a demon, buffeted the vehicle with its cold fist, but the driver remained steadfast."

wow

That reads like an entry for the Bulwer-Lytton contest.

@Nikon: Precisely what I was thinking. I'm actually pretty sure this would be a winning entry.

I'm not sure why, but I completely agree with you.