I wish I could make a show that people liked without so much as a single self-referential thought. This show is eternal in this poor, pathetic creature's life.
Both of them are going to have trouble living the fantasy when Ed and Bela finally do the nasty and produce a half-vampire something-or-other, since (much like being a vampire) it's something they probably won't experience.
For added fun, you can give them a DvD that has the adventures of a half-vampire in it, but I somehow don't think they'll like "Blade" as much since the acting and writing are far beyond what they're used to.