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Comment count is 46
That guy - 2016-06-29

I hate movies.


lotsmoreorcs - 2016-06-29

i hate you bitch boy, i will crush your fucking skull


lotsmoreorcs - 2016-06-29

*climbs into mech*


Gmork - 2016-06-29

Orcs redefines cringe.


Killer Joe - 2016-06-29

Sigh...

http://arstechnica.com/the-multiverse/2016/06/star-trek-beyond -will-be-one-extended-hpe-commercial-according-to-hpe/


That guy - 2016-06-29

I am shocked, *shocked* to find there is product placement going on in this franchise!!


Born in the RSR - 2016-06-30

Fuck you HP! Fuck you and your split! You're dying! Ya here me?! Dying!


Scrimmjob - 2016-06-29

I have a Trek super fan friend who was bitching to me about how bad the JJ Star Trek movies are (I haven't watched them). I tried to remind him that all of the TNG movies were pretty fucking terrible (with First Contact being the only possible exception). He refused to accept this as a fact, and forced me to borrow Nemesis from him, against my will. This was a few months ago, and the Nemesis DVD is still sitting on the end table by my front door.


fedex - 2016-06-29

When he starts bugging you to give it back, just pretend like you have no idea what he's talking about, as though he never even gave it to you.


Nikon - 2016-06-29

Don't see Nemesis. It's godawful. I wish I could have the memory of watching Nemesis scrubbed from my brain.


Scrimmjob - 2016-06-29

I was thinking of replacing the DVD with a facsimile disc which just contains the Plinkett review of Nemesis, as he nails why it sucks so bad in a very precise way.


Nominal - 2016-06-29

Yes, all the TNG movies (except half of First Contact) are terrible.

That does not excuse the level of terrible that Abrams takes them too. I think the observation was made that they are the Transformers movies with starships instead of robots and that it exactly right.

So while old Trek crap like The Final Frontier were awful, I would take that over the Michael Bay-inization of the franchise.

At this point the only value anyone sees in these movies is pissing off nerds.


memedumpster - 2016-06-29

Space Precinct blows Star Trek/Wars away so hard I forgot this movie was coming out.

At least the Final Frontier (a sentence begun by no one ever until today) was topical. It was about a crazy militant radical desert dwelling religious fanatic using pseudospirituality to get followers to wage jihad.

Into Darkness was about three hours long.


Kabbage - 2016-06-29

Star Trek Nemesis might be one of the worst movies I have ever seen.


Nikon - 2016-06-29

What Kabbage said, and it's not so bad it's good either. It's just extremely painful and unpleasant.


Born in the RSR - 2016-06-29

Am I the only one disappointed because I was expecting a Peter Gabriel cover?


Maggot Brain - 2016-06-29

At lest it's not a "sad kitty" cover, you know what I mean?


EvilHomer - 2016-06-29

Rihanna is far better than Peter Gabriel. Far, far better.


Binro the Heretic - 2016-06-29

Honestly, I am getting tired of the Enterprise getting destroyed in every other movie.

I mean, it was gut-wrenching and emotional in "The Search for Spock" but now it's like seeing a soap opera character wake up from a coma with amnesia. I'm, like, "Oh, for fuck's sake. This shit again?"

Lazy, lazy, lazy.


EvilHomer - 2016-06-29

I know this debate has been raging for nearly forty years, but I think it is now safe to say that Star Trek is the mere budget-version of Star Wars. All you get is films, and they're the B-films, meant to pad out JJ's time between Star Wars releases.

Discuss.


wtf japan - 2016-06-29

I don't understand how you can complain about Abrams violating the legacy of the original series. He kept all the tits, explosions, and heavy handed moral messages, and just made the wrasslin' slightly less homoerotic. Is that what you nerds are mad about?


chumbucket - 2016-06-29

I thought Abrams was done with Star Wars.


EvilHomer - 2016-06-29

He'll be producing the other ones, if memory and a cursory Duck search are any indication.


EvilHomer - 2016-06-29

OH SHIT


EvilHomer - 2016-06-29

SORRY! Very excited Homer moment. I just saw that the guy slated to direct the next Star Wars film is the same guy who directed the BEST Breaking Bad episode, "Fly"!!!

Nevermind. Turns out, Star Trek is the *G-grade* filler padding out JJ's Star Wars films.


Two Jar Slave - 2016-06-29

Nothing good has come from the name Star Trek since about 1998. It's not even worth harping on about or debating any more; Star Trek films come and go like bad weather that must be endured.

Star Wars fans had it rough for a long stretch of 35 years between Empire and Force Awakens. Maybe in another 17 or so years someone will figure out how to resuscitate Trek in a way that's true to its original spirit. In the meantime, wear longjohns and a toque.


Adham Nu'man - 2016-06-29

Force Awaken is absolute awful garbage.


TeenerTot - 2016-06-29

I'm not sure Star Trek has been good since Ricardo Montalban.


Maggot Brain - 2016-06-29

Being slightly better than what came before does not mean that the thing in question is any good. The Force Awakens was over a "better" movie than any of the prequels but the prequels had a good sound track. The Sith theme maybe on of my favorite pieces from the the series and the original movies was start to finish great music. So why did The Force Awakens fail so hard at this?


fedex - 2016-06-29

so much butthurt, its just a movie


Bobonne - 2016-06-29

Does Rhianna get disintegrated by a disrupter in this one? The slow kind heavy on the gruesome FX.

If so, I might go see it.

If not, it'll be just like the other two.


The Mothership - 2016-06-29

looks pretty boring alright.


betamaxed - 2016-06-29

The movie looks like a dumb slog but a far bit better than the insulting trash that was star trek into darkness.

We also have to take into account that america isn't even the primary audience for these movies. This is Star Trek for China.


Old_Zircon - 2016-06-29

That's a big factor in CGI blockbusters in general. Most of the problems with big, CGI heavy blockbusters in the last decade are things that were already pretty commonplace in Hong Kong blockbusters years earlier.


Old_Zircon - 2016-06-29

I guess I didn't finish my thought there, but fuck it.


TeenerTot - 2016-06-29

Begging the question: Beyond what?


simon666 - 2016-06-29

Beyond the preposition


Hooker - 2016-06-29

Since I don't care about this, let me ask a different question:

Is this song a direct response to Cyrus's Wrecking Ball? Do all pop stars have to do a construction machinery/tools song? When can I expect Katy Perry's Jackhammer?


Old_Zircon - 2016-06-29

I'm just so tired of all these Star Wars.


Maggot Brain - 2016-06-29

He crashed the ship again? Who keeps give this guy a command?


EvilHomer - 2016-06-29

>> Who keeps give this guy a command?

The military-industrial complex. Every ship crashed = another ship that needs to be built using the post-NWO equivalent of tax money.


Meerkat - 2016-06-29

He's like the McCain of Star Fleet.


bawbag - 2016-06-29

Ghostbusters is looking a lot better now.


Kabbage - 2016-06-29

I kiiiinda like this one?

No surprises, just more explosions, but still


garcet71283 - 2018-06-24

This was one of the good ones.


Nominal - 2022-04-07

Star Trek 2009: turning point climax = trolling Spock with a yo mama joke

Beyond: turning point climax = blasting Beastie Boys to disrupt the bad guys' communication

Both were cesspools with different flavor shit


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